


Little Hands, They Grab At Something

by TinySpiney



Series: I See You [2]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Role Reversal, Gen, Human Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Human CyberLife Tower Connor | RK800-60 (Detroit: Become Human), Role Reversal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-04
Updated: 2020-05-04
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:29:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23995303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TinySpiney/pseuds/TinySpiney
Summary: the title is from Breathe by Jonathan Young and Caleb Hyles
Relationships: Cole Anderson & Connor, Connor & CyberLife Tower Connor | RK800-60, Connor & Gavin Reed
Series: I See You [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1730275
Comments: 2
Kudos: 28





	Little Hands, They Grab At Something

**Author's Note:**

> the title is from Breathe by Jonathan Young and Caleb Hyles

_ September 30th 2029 12:17 AM _

  
  


That was what the fucking clock read. That was the fucking time Sumo decided to bark and howl at to wake up his owner. It wasn’t like Connor could be mad at the dog, if you gotta go then you gotta go. Besides, he was still a puppy, even if he was still almost gigantic. Connor gave an exaggerated groan as he rolled out of bed. It was early as hell, he slept barely even two hours. He was allowed to drag his feet just a little bit. So he did. He pushed his feet into his slippers in the hallway and literally dragged his heels across the hardwood floor before the carpet. Sumo was whining, pawing at the door and looked back at Connor expectantly. Well fuck now he just felt bad for making the dog wait even the few seconds he did. He could make it up to him later with a few treats. Connor yawned and unlocked the door before opening it, eyes closed and waiting for the sound of Sumo’s claws on the concrete front step. Though he didn’t hear it. Connor rubbed at one of his eyes before looking outside. It wasn’t raining and it wasn’t windy, both things Sumo didn’t like. So why the hell wasn’t he going out? Then Connor looked down to where Sumo sniffed at the ground.  _ Fuck. _

There was a baby. There was a  _ fucking infant _ on his doorstep. What was this, a fuckin’ movie about the Victorian Era? No, no way, this wasn’t happening. Connor gently shoved Sumo out of the way, silently thanking the dog for waking him up, and knelt on the ground to get a better look at the infant. There was a note stuck in the blanket,  _ ‘Cole 9/23/2029’ _ was scrawled in black ink. Well, Connor had a name and handwriting sample at least. He tried his best to pick up the baby, pick up Cole, without waking him. Unfortunately, he woke the kid up. The wails were  _ instant. _ Connor didn’t know what to do, he stood up and bounced the kid in his arms. For fuck’s sake he was  _ twenty, _ he didn’t know how to take care of a baby. Sure he helped take care of Niles when he was asked, but he always had his parents to tell him exactly what to do. Besides, they were only three years apart. That was nothing like this. Nothing like just finding a fucking  _ baby _ on his doorstep. But the ache in his chest was the same as when Niles used to cry. 

He had no idea what to do. He didn’t know, he didn’t  _ know. _ He was working purely on the adrenaline of finding a fucking kid abandoned on his doorstep and trying not to freak out about it. Whoever left him was long gone, with no intentions of keeping him. The note said everything Connor needed to know upon finding him. Who the hell were this kid’s parents? Why did they feel the need to give him up? Why couldn’t they just go to social services or an adoption agency instead? There had to be someone else. There had to be someone else more qualified than Connor to deal with this. He was  _ twenty, _ he was just a beat cop who planned on standing up for the little guy. He never planned for this. He never even thought of this being a possibility in his life. But fucking life decided to throw him a curveball and say “Fuck you, you’re going to recieve an infant and you’re gonna freak out about it.” before spitting in his face with said infant. There had to be something else that could be done. Connor couldn’t deal with this. There had to be someone better. 

_ Amanda.  _

Captain Stern would know what to do, she mentioned having kids before. 

It wasn’t like he had any other choice anyway. 

Connor bounced Cole in his arms, quickly and securely adjusting his grip as he grabbed for his phone and car keys. Maybe the leash too since Sumo was such a good boy and honestly Connor needed the support. Shit, did he need a carseat? He couldn’t just leave the kid alone. Would he even be able to find one at this hour? Probably not. Fuck, fuck, fuck. The kid was probably hungry and tired, not to mention the fact that Connor could feel just how cold he was. He rushed back into his room, setting Cole down in the middle of the bed just to make sure he wouldn’t roll off the side and get hurt. 

Shit it wasn’t like Connor had anything that could help. Why was he even rummaging around his closet then? Fuck, fuck, fuck, maybe he should call his parents. No, no they would ask if the kid was his and he knew for a fact that he wasn’t. He wasn’t sleeping around with anybody. How could the kid be his if he never fucked anybody? Maybe he could call Reed, they were friends. No he’d ask the same thing. The sound of Cole’s crying getting louder made him start to freak out even more.  _ God, did that kid have a set of pipes on him. _ Connor started throwing things out of his closet and trying to find something,  _ anything, _ that could help him. There was absolutely  _ nothing. _ Aside from a bunch of blankets he kept for when Caleb and Niles would come over. Fuck that would have to be good enough. The kid was freezing, it wasn’t like he would get too hot in the twenty minutes it took to get to the DPD. Or would he? Fuck. Connor laid the blankets down at the foot of the bed and started to fold them in a way that would make it easier for the kid to be wrapped up in them. Sumo stood patiently in the doorway as Connor picked up Cole to swaddle him. But he waited just a second. God, he was cold. 

Cole’s crying quieted a little bit as Connor brought the infant up closer to his face. He was such a tiny little thing, how could anyone ever leave him all by himself. His face was all blotchy and red from crying, tears and mucus running down his face. Connor took a tissue from the box on his night table and delicately wiped his face clean. Big green eyes looked back at Connor for the first time. It was like his heart just...exploded. It ached and it pounded but it loved and it yearned. As Connor brought Cole just a little closer to his face, knowing fully well that babies couldn’t actually see very far, Cole stuck his chubby little baby arms out. Hands grabbing out at nothing until he was close enough to put a hand on Connor’s nose and grab at it.  _ Fuck. _ Connor smiled as Cole grabbed at his curls and tugged on them. It hurt, but he didn’t know any better. He was just looking for something to hold onto. Connor grinned as Cole started playing with his hair and making little noises. He’d have to find one of his old stuffed animals to give him in the car. It would keep him quiet on the way back home, too. He’d either be too busy playing with it, or he’d be asleep holding it.

No. No, Connor wasn’t taking him in. This wasn’t his kid. Somewhere out there he had parents. Somewhere out there someone very well could have been looking for their son. Connor gently pried Cole’s fingers from his hair and set him down on the blankets to swaddle him in. Thank fuck he still remembered how to do that. Niles was starting to run around more by the time Connor had started watching their parents wrap him up in blankets, but he loved the big smile Niles had so he committed it to memory. His hands were clumsy and shaky from the lack of sleep. Coffee, he needed coffee. He could bring Cole to the DPD after he had caffeine. Instead of wrapping him up in blankets, Connor picked him up again. Maybe if he quietly spoke it would help Cole a little more. Babies liked it when people talked to them, right? Niles sure did. He would sit in the room and babble to people. Maybe he just wanted to be included, now that Connor was thinking about it. That was beside the point. He needed coffee and then he needed to load everybody in the car and get to the DPD. Hell, maybe he could do some work while he was in that early. Early? Late? It didn’t matter anymore. 

Connor yawned again, making sure to turn his face away from Cole just in case he decided to try and stick his hand in Connor’s mouth. Cole seemed to be happy just to be held. Niles was a happy baby, too, at least from what Connor could remember. He turned on the coffee maker and decided to go sit on the couch to wait. Sumo jumped up as soon as Connor was comfortable, sniffing at Cole and gently nudging his tiny body with his nose.  _ Fuck, that was cute.  _ Connor bounced Cole in his arms, letting Sumo crawl into his lap and lay down. It was, fuckin’ what, probably almost half past midnight. Yet here Connor was; a Saint Bernard puppy sprawled across his lap, while he held an infant who seemed to just adore him. He wasn’t going to say he could get used to it. But it was something he found himself not exactly opposed to. Connor wiggled his legs until Sumo moved when the coffee maker beeped. He grabbed the graduation gift from Caleb, an incredibly soft and plush bear. It was tan with a brown bow around its neck. It was basically the same size as Cole, but it would have to do for now. Connor tucked it in Cole’s hands and watched as he nuzzled into it.  _ Fuck, that was adorable. _

After drinking half the mug, having to switch arms every so often because Cole still weighed a good amount despite being so tiny, Connor finally wrapped him up in the blankets and started to head out to the car. Shit was the radio up high? Would it be a good idea to turn the heat up too much while Cole was wrapped in blankets? Could he even have a seatbelt on him at that size? Fuck, fuck, fuck. Okay, it was okay. Connor could do this. He was a cop for fuck’s sake. A cop in Detroit! He unlocked the car, leaving Sumo’s leash clipped onto his collar and letting him climb in the backseat. He leaned over the clutch and buckled Cole into the passenger’s seat as best he could. While it absolutely would be safer to keep him in the back seat, Connor wanted him exactly where he could see him. Grab him to protect him if anything went wrong. He covered Cole’s ears as he turned the car on. Oh thank  _ fuck, _ the radio was down low. Cole looked at him with big eyes and then started to play with the seatbelt, trying to put it in his mouth. Connor grabbed the stuffed animal from under his arm and wrapped Cole’s little arms around it. Playing with it and chewing on the tag instead. Weird. But hey, it was better than the seatbelt. Connor didn’t even know if he should clean the damn thing.  _ Could _ he clean it even? What happened when someone tried? I probably just got wet and smelled weird for a little while. But still. 

The entire ride was spent with Connor making sure Cole was safe and secure in the passenger's seat, looking back to make sure Sumo wasn’t chewing on anything, and worrying himself out of his goddamn mind. By the time they had actually pulled up to the precinct, Connor was sure he was about to scream. He wasn’t going to of course. It would be loud and scare Cole. But  _ fuck, _ did he want to. Luckily, the first person he saw was a familiar face. Well Connor didn’t see a face. But rather, he saw a very exasperated body flop down into a chair and then loudly sigh. Gavin just happened to be pulling an all-nighter. Gavin would listen to him so long as it was in person, see Connor’s expression and  _ know _ that Cole wasn’t his. The thought made Connor’s chest ache a bit, but he ignored it. Connor looked down to Cole in his arms. Now only in the initial blanket Connor found him in, and looking like he was about to fall asleep. He was such a cute baby. With his chubby little cheeks and wisps of what would probably be blonde hair. Connor made his way behind Gavin’s chair and cleared his throat to announce his presence. Gavin lazily turned around, eyes half-lidded and looking like he was about to pass out. Though his eyes went as wide as the goddamn moon when he saw what, or rather  _ who, _ Connor was carrying. Moving to pet the dog, Gavin yawned and then spoke. 

  
  


“Whose kid?”

“I’m kind of hoping that’s somethin’ we can figure out.”

“Ugh,  _ god, _ Con.” Gavin slid down to the floor to hug Sumo. It wasn’t the first time Connor had seen Gavin like this. But it wasn’t any less amusing to see it again. “Okay, so how the hell did you suddenly come into possession of a child? One that looks like it’s a newborn, might I fuck--”

“Nope. No swearing.”

“That’s-- You’re awful, that’s a  _ baby.  _ Nothing we say matters.”

“Matters to me.” Connor decided to sit in Gavin’s chair and half lay Cole in his lap. “His name is Cole, birthday was the twenty-third. Sumo was barkin’ to wake me up until I opened the door to let ‘im out, and I found a baby on my doorstep.”

  
  


After a while of grumbled swears from Gavin, he helped. He gathered everyone he could at the precinct and told them what was going on and what they would need to do. Gavin even called Captain Stern,  _ he called her at almost one in the morning, _ and requested she come in for a special case. Once he mentioned it involved an infant, Connor could hear her tone shift on the phone slightly. Maybe she wasn’t such a stone-cold bitch after all. Regardless, Connor was just happy to relax for a minute with Cole. Ben Collins even went out to grab some basic necessities for the kid. He gave Connor a knowing smile and told him good luck. Oh great. See, logically, Connor knew infants were a handful. He knew that they needed extra care and attention, needed specific things varying from child to child. But the fact that one of his coworkers told him good luck? That just made it  _ real. _ That he, Connor Anderson, was sitting in his partner’s chair holding an infant that was left on his doorstep in the middle of the night. He didn’t even know how long Cole had been out there for. All Connor knew was that he was cold and he had interrupted Cole’s nap. 

When Captain Stern came into the bullpen, it was obvious she was thinking as a mother first. She got dressed, sure thing, but her hair wasn’t up. Connor couldn’t help but think that she looked nice like that. Maybe she wasn’t as uptight at home. He hoped she wasn’t at least, the stress of the job would eat her alive. He knew that she acted a certain way because she had to. She had been on the force for so long that she changed to better her work ethic. Connor just hoped that she would be speaking with him as a kind mother, rather than a disappointed police captain. He was pleasantly surprised to see her smile when she saw him, it didn’t quite reach her eyes, but it was still the first time Connor had seen her smile. She spoke quietly and started going through the brown paper bag of things that Ben had gotten for Connor. A quick smile and whisper that she would be back, and she was off with the bag. Oh she was absolutely thinking as a mother first. Honestly though? Connor was thankful. He could get pointers from her if he needed, god knew he would need it-- 

_ No.  _

_ No he was not taking Cole home. _

A minute or so later, Captain Stern came back. Apparently she made a bottle of formula for the kid. She moved Connor’s arms, speaking quietly yet again, and showed him just how to hold Cole properly to feed him. It was...an experience. To say the least. He had never even seen Captain Stern not...well.  _ Stern. _ As shitty of a pun it was, it was accurate. But he was grateful for her help. Even more so that no one asked him a damn thing. He was just as confused as everyone else was as to why an infant was left on his doorstep. It wasn’t like his neighbours didn’t know he was on the force. Hell, he busted some of them for Red Ice deals. That was something he could see himself getting into though, busting Red Ice deals. He liked the proof that he was making a difference. Maybe he and Gavin could transfer to narcotics for a while, see what good they could do. 

After some pointers from Captain Stern, Connor had successfully fed, and then subsequently gotten spit up on by, Cole. He held the kid out in front of him a bit so as to not get anything on him. Gavin came over with a grey DPD hoodie and threw it at his head as soon as Cole was in Captain Stern’s arms. Sumo sat at his feet as he didn't even bother to move. Connor just peeled his shirt off and pulled the DPD hoodie over his head. It was a little big on him and kind of smelled like smoke, it must have been Gavin’s. It was nice and warm though. Maybe Cole would have liked the added warmth when Connor held hi--

_ He wasn’t fucking taking Cole home with him. _

_ He needed to stop thinking like he was. _

Pretty soon, Caleb stumbled through the precinct until he fell on his knees at Connor’s feet. He looked worse for wear, like he hadn’t slept in days. He had massive bags under his eyes and was pale as all hell. He even shook a bit as he hugged Sumo to his chest, the dog wiggling and whimpering at the tightness of Caleb’s grip. Something was wrong. Something was seriously wrong. His eyes immediately went to the infant being handed back to Connor, wide and almost glazed over. Connor held Cole closer to his chest protectively. What was going on?

  
  


“Please tell me that’s Cole.”

“What--”

“Connor,” Caleb let go of Sumo and grabbed at his brother’s pajama clad legs, bunching up the fabric and tugging on it. “We just got a call from a woman, I was on patrol with Chris and we tracked it. She was-- She left her son in your neighbourhood. Said his name was Cole, she needed him safe, she was scared. God, Connor, her  _ voice-- _ ”

“Caleb, Caleb calm down. Take a breath.” Connor didn’t know what to say. She  _ left _ him there? He understood she feared for his safety. But she just  _ left _ him? With no thoughts as to check and see if he was safe before leaving him? “Yeah, this is Cole. What happened? Did you find her?”

“Traced the call--” Caleb was cut off by a gasp for breath. He was panicking, he was starting to hyperventilate. Connor slid down on the floor, still holding Cole close to himself, and used one arm to run his hand through his twin’s hair. His eyes were a little more focused. “She’s dead. Whoever she was running from made her inhale Red Ice until she passed out. It-- Fuck, Con, it killed her.”

“Oh,  _ Caleb. _ ”

  
  


It was the first body he’d seen. Connor knew that Caleb had his fair share of tough scrapes. He’d already gotten shot in his first week, it grazed his leg, but it still spooked him something fierce. He’d been in knife fights, he’d chased suspects through the city, he’d even negotiated with some guy holding an entire store’s worth of people hostage. But this was his first dead body. They were cops, it was only a matter of time before they would see bodies. Connor had yet to see one, but Caleb… It seemed that he and Chris had seen their first tonight. To Connor’s surprise, Gavin came over and whisked him away to the hallway to the archive room. He talked about joining narcotics, he and Connor making a Red Ice Task Force, he wanted to change the world for the kid. Even if it was little by little. Even if it was only slightly. Connor smiled and agreed. It looked like his wasn’t the only heart Cole wormed his way into. 

Caleb came into the hall after a few minutes. Gavin stopped talking about the plans for the Task Force and backed up a bit. Caleb looked so  _ tired. _ Even if he was only older by six minutes, Connor couldn’t help the instinct to take care of him. They had been attached at the hip basically since birth, he wanted to hug his brother and tell him it was okay. But a certain tiny someone was already in his arms. A tiny someone who was finally falling back asleep and was resting his chubby cheek against Connor’s shoulder. So Connor motioned for his brother to come over with a sigh, and let him lean over and rest his head against his other shoulder. Despite the fact that he was bouncing Cole in his arms, Caleb’s head stayed put. They stayed like that for a while. Connor bouncing Cole until his arms started to hurt and he settled for just holding him, and Caleb leaning against his twin and resting his head on his shoulder. It was a good ten minutes before anyone spoke up again. Even then, it was quiet. Connor didn’t want to wake Cole up. He was still so small, he needed to sleep, he needed to be held close and kept warm, needed to know that he was loved. 

  
  


“I’m taking this kid in.” 

“Connor you’re only  _ twenty. _ Dude,  _ you’re _ still a kid.”

“He  _ needs _ someone, Caleb.” Connor hugged Cole just a little tighter. “Besides, I knew I loved him when he first grabbed at my face and hair. Hurt like hell when he tugged on it. But his tiny happy sounds were well worth it.”

“Connor, yo--”

“Gavin and I are joining narcotics, we already talked about it. We’re joining narcotics and we’re going to fight to fuc-- To take down Red Ice distribution.” Connor looked down at Cole in his arms. Sleeping peacefully, for another two hours at least. But he was comfortable and he was  _ safe. _ “No one can stop me. I’m giving this kid a  _ home, _ I’m going to  _ protect _ him.” 

“At least let us help you get everything set up first.” Gavin leaned against the wall and smirked at the twins. “What? We’re friends, Con. You expect me  _ not _ to help ya? Besides, my detective’s gut tells me you’re right. You should take the kid in. Give ‘im a home.”

  
  


It was decided then. Connor would leave Cole with Amanda, she likely wouldn’t mind, and he would go with Caleb and Gavin to get what he’d need. Fuck it, they’d bring Niles, too. He didn’t have school, he could have some fun with his brothers. Plus Gavin. Though, if Connor was to be honest with himself, he was pretty sure Caleb and Gavin were going to get together at some point. So there was a pretty good chance that Niles would start to see more of Gavin anyway. But that was beside the point. The Andersons could go to the mall, have a blast, and buy baby stuff. They’d have to drag it back home in their dad’s truck, but that was minimal damage control. Niles could just say that he wanted to take the truck out for a spin if he asked. The plan was virtually foolproof. 

Besides, they could help Connor set everything up. Spend time together. It was such a scarce thing once the twins joined the force. Niles could come with them to the station to pick up Cole. He could see everything and learn a little more about where his big brothers worked. Get him to be a little more at ease when it came to the job. He could meet Cole. His nephew. Connor teared up a bit at the thought. He was going to be a father. This was his son. Maybe not biologically, but this… This tiny little thing that was just a week old.  _ Cole was his son. _ Connor smiled and turned to press a quick kiss to his brother’s head before giving Cole a kiss on the top of his head. His  _ family. _

  
  


“I love you.”

  
  


Connor wasn’t sure who he said it to. If it was meant for Caleb or for Cole. But it was true either way. He loved them both dearly, even if he had only known one for an hour or two at the most. But how could he not? The second he brought Cole up to his face, the second the kid tugged on his hair and grabbed at his nose. He knew he was already in love. That was when Cole became his son, and whoever said otherwise be damned. Cole was his son. He was going to give him a good life. A good family. 

  
  


“I love you so, so much.”

  
  
  
  



End file.
